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Sep 17

What to Say About Miss America If You’re Human Garbage


Good news, disgusting bigots! I wrote your next six Miss America tweets. Check it out on Thought Catalog.

Sep 16

Franzen Gripe or YouTube Comment About Saggy Pants?


Is Jonathan Franzen a plagiarist? Take my new quiz and find out!

Sep 14

The 8 Most Bizarre Celebrity Videogame Pitchmen


My latest for Dorkly, guest-starring Bryan Cranston, ODB and Pac-Man

Aug 21

The Real Mindset List for the Class of 2017


My meticulously researched, 100% accurate update of Beloit College’s annual “Mindset List,” up today on Thought Catalog

Aug 15

Other Resorts Owned and Operated by Papa Roach

  • Club Bled
  • Gnaw Valley
  • Mutilated Turtle Bay
  • No Avail Mountain
  • Ratlantis
  • Papa Roach’s Penultimate Resort
  • Sandals
Aug 10

The 35 Funniest Facebook Posts by People Who Thought the Onion Was Real


I compiled Literally Unbelievable’s best posts for Thought Catalog, check it out

Aug 9

11 Terrible Videogames Worth More Than Your First Car


My essential guide to $3000 doorstops, up today on Dorkly

Jun 17

Justin Giger

Justin Giger: The secret pop obsession of Alien designer H.R. Giger.

Jun 13

Yo, That Is Racist

The internet can be an ugly place. Let it know with YoThatIsRacist.com.

May 21

The Very Best of Train